I received this e-mail:

Dear Wendy,

There are areas of my life that I would like assistance with and believe you can help.

Areas of concern

1. Restoring equilibrium.

2. Achieving and maintaining balance.

3. Developing successful relationships.

Please advise

Alastair

I’m flattered that someone would ask me questions you would normally save for God or a well-trained therapist:).

I also felt challenged to answer them.

Within this issue, and the following two, I will do my best to suggest ways of restoring balance, maintaining balance, and having successful relationships.

Here I go...

EQUILIBRIUM=BALANCE

Finding equilibrium is really about finding balance between opposing beliefs and actions.

Imagine you are sitting on a chair in the middle of a room. Imagine two people standing in front of you, two on each side of you and two behind you. They are all talking to you at the same time. They’re offering advice, criticism, observations and on and on. This chorus of chaos is becoming so overwhelming that you can’t recognize your own voice. You get confused and you get frustrated.

What do you do?

You get off the chair. You wave goodbye to the endless chatter and you leave. And once you have chosen to leave you can find your own voice again.

FACING YOURSELF IS THE ONLY WAY

YOU WILL FIND BALANCE

TRUTH

NO ONE KNOWS YOU BETTER THAN YOU KNOW YOURSELF

NO ONE KNOWS YOUR TRUTH BETTER THAN YOU DO.

For too long you have been lead to believe things about yourself that, in your heart, you knew weren’t true. Have you ever had your family, friends, teachers, co-workers, mates or even total strangers make judgements about you that hurt you deeply? You knew they were so very wrong, but it was hard to dismiss their words and you began to question whether or not they were right. Then somehow those words began to have a power over you and you began to feel lost within the darkness of their negativity.

It is time to face your truth.

Who are you?

What do you want most from your life?

What is most important to you, now and always?

Truth will:

-make your life more clear

-heal your heart

-free you from living a life you feel you have to rather than want to live

-let you see what (and who) is real and what (and who) isn’t real

WANT THE TRUTH-CHOOSE THE TRUTH

Facing the truth about your life will be one of the highest walls you will have to scale. But believe me, beyond that wall is a beauty that comes with the freedom truth brings to your mind and to your spirit.

Balance will come when you can look at YOUR life, come to terms with YOUR mistakes, celebrate YOUR successes and feel you owe no explanation or reasoning for YOUR choices because you are at peace with yourself.

FINDING TRUTH

You know the truth. The answers to all of your questions and the resolutions to your fears are stored away like books in the far corner of an attic. You can come to them. You can use them. They are your truths.

TRUST YOURSELF

Trust the things you experience (what you see, hear, smell, touch) and especially trust what you feel.

Having someone profess to know what is right or wrong for you is like walking into a theatre when a movie is halfway through and asking someone to tell you what you’ve missed. Their experience and their description will not be yours.

Trust that the way you feel, the way you really feel, about you and your life is right for you.

KEEP A JOURNAL

It may not sound like a profound task, but it is.

The best way you can regain self-trust is by getting comfortable with your thoughts and feelings. Writing things down and, most importantly, going back and reading your words will help you to clearly see who you are and how dynamic you are.

SILENCE

Turn off the noise...just for a while.

Try and find the time to experience quiet either just after you wake up or just before you go to sleep. You need to stop ignoring what your body is trying to tell you, what your heart is yearning for, and what subtle thoughts are flowing through your mind. Day by day reach inward and discover what it is you need the most.

WHAT DO YOU NEED?

TAKE CARE AND BELIEVE

Finding balance isn’t a goal you set then achieve.

It’s a way of life.

There’s a knock at your door. You answer it and find a small child. Rain soaked and shivering out of fear, the child looks at the ground while telling you that he is lost and has been walking for most of the night. He tells you that he came to your house because you had the brightest light shining from your window. You invite the child inside. As he takes gentle steps into your home, he puts his faith in you. Hoping that you’ll have compassion to spare, this lost child looks to you for safety and trusts that you’ll take care of him.

What would you do?

Take your answer to that question and offer the exact same thing to yourself.

Find balance by realizing you are a significant human being. Your presence on Earth, everything you chose to do, and everything you chose to say DOES MATTER.

Come closer...come closer to who you are. Don’t fear yourself because of your past. Don’t distrust yourself because of an uncertain future. Feel what exists inside of you right now. Believe in who you are and what you have to offer.

Be proud of what is inside your heart.

Be proud of who you are and what you have the capability of becoming.